Greetings fellow nerds, weirdos and anyone else who may have stumbled in,
My name is Emma, and here you shall join me on a journey through the weird and very very random.
Here is a picture of me about to get eaten by a giant, don't worry, I am still alive! I stabbed him in the eye with my extremely pointy elbows and he ran off screaming like a little bitch..
It's in fact an advertisement for "Jack the Giant Slayer" which is being released soon to cinemas... Looks so fantastic I plan on giving the £4.50 additional fee I would spend watching it in IMAX to a homeless person. If you did think it looked good, or were planning to watch it... "Shame on you sir".
Let's look at a few reviews from one of my favourite websites www.rottentomatoes.com , in which case the film has a 5.7/10 at present from critics..
This one made me laugh - "Finally... a movie where the problems of three little people actually amount to a hill of beans." William Bibbiani - CraveOnline
And something from the Wall Street Journal slagging of us common folk.. i think.. in fact can someone translate this for me because I have no idea what he is saying - "Jack's problem is that he's a commoner, but the movie's problem is that its script is commoner still, an enchantment-free pretext for animated action, straight-ahead storytelling and ersatz romance." Joe Morgenstern - Wall Street Journal
SPOILET ALERT!!
What is this "ERSATZ", answers on a postcard please.. I thought it was a type of coffee. Im not sure how this film intends to be a "coffee romance" maybe it turns out Jacks Bean, was a coffee bean, and thereby no giant vine grows and his mother beats him to death with a frying pan, hence the PG13 rating.
Heres a picture for you of this very very intelligent individual entitled.. Joe Morgenstern, for shits and giggles.
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Oh yeah I went off topic a bit there, about me, what do you need to know... Well not a lot. I'm probably not your full tin of beans, or 3 pence short of a bus journey.. or however those sayings go. So take everything I say with a pinch of salt, or get angry and attempt to troll me to death. Everyone loves a good troll every now and again.
Enjoy or dont, but keep reading anyway!
Let the trolling commence!!
Well that was fun. A nice miture of review and, indeed, randomness. I approve.
ReplyDeleteSo you write out a lovely comment all for it to be destroyed by the internet. So paraphrasing myself (wrongly), you do indeed have pointy elbows that I didn't get poked with. I did offer you that 3p for your bus fare but you want to stay mental so I shall be all superior in my shiny world that smells of chlorine.
ReplyDeleteSteve I wasnt paraphrasing you in the first place :P Lots of people make comments about my elbows.. You cant go around thinking you are the only person looking at my elbows!
ReplyDeleteNo I mean I had to paraphrase my own lost comment but I forgotted most of it so had to guess. Nice elbows though! I have called shotgun or your elbows so only I can now!
ReplyDelete